Welcome, Alexander!

Alexander James Roebuck

July 28, 2011 • 1:28 p.m.

8 lbs. 4 oz. • 20.25 inches

On Receiving Help

I'm less than one week out from my due date, and it looks like this little guy is going to arrive in the next few days. We are all excited and eager to meet him!

My mom's sister, Carol, has been here all week helping me prepare in body and soul for this baby's birth. She has given so much to me– she's been taking the kids on outings every day (which they are loving, of course!) so that I can sneak a nap in here and there; going to the doctor with me; and offering a hug and a teardrop or two that we both understand at just the right moments. Her arrival has given new meaning to the term "Godsend" for me.

Since Aunt Carol's been here, I've been thinking a lot about what my mom taught me about receiving help. She taught me, especially in her last three years of life, that simply and gratefully receiving and accepting help when we need it is a posture of humility and grace. It's a posture that recognizes that we are weak, that we can't do it on our own. It's a posture that understands that God has sent help not only because He loves me, but because He loves the giver.

My pride bucks against this idea, of course. I want to prove that I'm capable and strong and independent– which is actually laughable to anyone who's around me for more than about 30 seconds! When I'm able to simply and humbly accept help– without trying to downplay or repay the gift– the Gospel is at work in my life. I want to live in that place more.

The Lord knows that I've been at a pretty needy place the last few weeks. And the truth is, I didn't even know how badly I would need my Aunt here until she arrived. The Lord knew. And I'm truly grateful to the point of being overwhelmed. Out of love for me and for Carol, He sent her at just the right time. I'm actually feeling rested in body and soul for the first time in months. I actually feel like I can do this now!

Thank you for all of you who have been praying for me in the last few weeks. I know you have been. I've been receiving your help, too. Thank you, thank you, my dear friends.

Happy news is on the horizon! Can't wait to introduce you all to the new little man.

Happy Birthday, Grandpa Chaney!

Here's a little birthday message for one of our favorite Grandpas.... these video clips also happen to offer some insight into the personalities of these two little Roebucks, hence the inclusion of the outtake. :-)

A message for Grandpa Chaney, Take 1:

A message for Grandpa Chaney, Take 2:

We love you, Dad/ Grandpa Chaney. Wish we could be with you on your special day!

School Supplies!

I have a big master "To Do" list going of all the things to keep me productive and on track until this baby makes his grand entrance. One of the items on the list: Get Max's school supplies. I couldn't believe it when I pulled out the calendar today because Max wanted to know how many days until school starts. Three Weeks and Three Days until Kindergarten Open House!!! Wow- and I know it is going to be a whirlwind between now and then with the baby's arrival.

So off to Walmart we went with school supply list in hand. Max was so excited, and so was I. I always loved school supply time when I was a kid- and it was so fun to see Max enjoy it as well. He wanted to sit in the cart to organize the items as we picked them out. He told me, "I've got them all organized, because it's important to be organized when you're in school." :-)

Kindergarten, here we come!

Remembering

Today we were opening up a package of sight word magnets to work on, and I mentioned that Grandmama Vicki had bought these for us. Max asked why she got them for us, and I said it was because she loved to see her grandkids learning to read and write. I told them that before she had cancer, she was a kindergarten teacher at the same school Max will be going to in a few weeks.

A huge smile came across his face and he giggled. "I wish I could be in that class," he said through his giggle.

And it just made me so happy and sad all at once. Happy because he remembers. Happy because he knows how much she loved him and how much she loved to teach him. Sad because we won't be able to share this huge kindergarten milestone with her, and she would have loved it. Sad because it's only been four months, and so many years stretch out ahead where we'll be missing her.

Mom never really felt like being a teacher was her calling in life. But she sure was good at it.

"But Mom, My Animals *Really* Needed a Bath"

Bitter–Sweet

It's been a hard few weeks. I'm waging a mental battle between gratitude and sadness. I know I have so much to be grateful for, and I believe that should be enough to keep me from being so sad. And yet, I'm sad.

Nowhere is this tension more poignant than in the preparations to welcome our sweet baby boy into our home. Of course I'm so thankful that God has blessed us with this little life, I'm excited to meet him, and I am so grateful that he appears to be healthy and growing. But as his due date approaches (just about 6 weeks away), I'm finding myself having such a different response than I have in my other pregnancies. It's hard to explain, but instead of the eagerness I felt at this point with my other two, I'm facing a slight sense of uncertainty, even dread– if I'm willing to admit it.

I don't want to do this without my mom.

It's not that I'm afraid or dreading making the transition to three kids without my mom's physical and emotional help, although she was such a tremendous help when my other two babies were born. I just don't want to cross this line. I don't want enter a new phase of life that she will never have touched. And yet this little one is coming and life is moving on. It's a newborn baby, for Pete's sake! Pure sweetness. But tinged with bitter these days.

Last week I washed all his tiny clothes, set up his dresser and put together his crib. But I couldn't quite figure out how to finish the assembly on the crib, and then burst into tears realizing that my mom had assembled this crib before both Max and Maggie were born. My poor husband came home from work to find me sitting at the computer sobbing as I tried to see through my tears to google the make and model of the crib to find assembly instructions. Not a good moment.

But I will do this. God has so graciously heaped blessing upon blessing upon blessing on me during the last three months, and this child is certainly the greatest of those blessings. I am certain that the timing of his life and his arrival's intersection with my own grief is not arbitrary, but orchestrated by a gracious God Who loves me and Who loves him.

We are just about ready to welcome the new little buddy. He's coming into a family with a whole lot of grandparents, uncles, aunts and cousins and love. So even if his mommy is a tad bit sad underneath the celebration, I think he'll be okay. I suppose that sadness is born of love, too.

What Maggie Thinks About A Lot These Days

Maggie: "This is Aunt Laura with her baby in her womb, and Uncle Jake when he was a little boy."

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I thought this was hilarious and so true!

I'm thinking back to every computer problem Lucas has ever solved for me (there have been a few!), and I now realize that he followed this exact flow chart every time. Genius! :-)

http://xkcd.com/627/

Conversations with Max and Maggie

Me: Maggie, I really loved how you and Anna and Mikaiah all three played together so nicely today so that no one was left out.

Max: What's 'left out?'

Me: It means when some kids are playing together and they don't include all the kids in whatever they're doing. It can be especially tricky when there are three friends because two friends might play together and leave the other friend out. Next year when you're in school, I bet you'll get a lot of practice showing kindness by including all the kids– by helping make sure nobody gets left out.

Max: Or, I could just go play with the kid who's alone and being left out.

Lucas: That would be a very honorable thing to do. That would make me proud.

Maggie: (quickly interrupting, as if she's looking for some hypothetically honorable action she could contribute...) Well, if I'm in school and I see girls being silly, I'll just DO A BOOTY DANCE!!!

Oh, my.

Conversations with Maximus

On our way to the restroom in Sam's Club, Max spots a poster on the wall of their offices titled "Entrepreneur's Creed" with a picture of Sam Walton's face under the title.

Max: Look- There's Sam Walton.

Me: Max, how did you know that was Sam Walton?

Max: I just checked my brain.

Her Grandmama's Girl

Maggie spotted these 5-inch beauties in TJMaxx and just had to try them on. She looked up and said, "OOoooooh, Look, Mommy! These shoes totally fit me!"

She definitely did not get this shoe fetish from me. I'm pinning this one on Grandmama Vicki. :-)

Conversations with Maximus

Max: I love this Batman shirt. I just LOVE Batman! What does 'love' mean, anyway?

Me: Well... it means you care deeply about something or someone. It's more than really, really liking something.

Max: (thinking for a moment) Huh. I really like Batman. But I love, LOVE God!

After a Week with Paul T. Semones

Max and Lucas just returned from a week-long road trip adventure to visit the Kennedy Space Center with our good friend Paul. I need get to some photos of their trip up here, but in the mean time, here are some of the things Max is saying since his return from studying all things NASA. Basically, he likes to use the word "engineer" as many times as possible in any given sentence:

Max: Mommy, come look at the tall castle I built. At first I didn't have it properly engineered. I didn't have it built right on the bottom to make it work on the top. But then I engineered it and added these parts at the bottom so that it would work.

Getaway ideas

Lucas and I are hoping to take a trip together before baby #3 arrives. Does anybody out there have recommendations for an affordable, relaxing destination? I would love a beach, but our budget is pretty tight and so we'll need to drive there from NWA. I'm willing to get creative, though. So if anybody knows of any scientific studies in teleportation that would to take us from Arkansas to, say, the Canary Islands, Spain or Goa, India or Anguilla for a week... I think we'd consider giving it a shot. :-)

Seriously, though... any good ideas for getaways out there, friends?

Jenna-Clare is publishing her first novel!

My dear friend and college roommate Jenna-Clare is publishing her first novel! Check it out: click this link and like her page, and/or pledge some support to help her reach her publishing goals and get a first-run copy of the book! So excited for J-C!

A Royal at Heart

Somebody woke up early to watch the Royal Wedding of William and Catherine with her mum and auntie. I see many days of princess bride dreams ahead of us....

He is Risen Indeed

It's Easter night, and I just tucked my children into bed. Max asked if we could sing "Christ the Lord is Risen Today" as a bedtime song. After we sang it once, he asked if he could write some new words for the song. Here are his new lyrics, to the tune of "Christ the Lord is Risen Today":

A-lle-luia, Praise the LORD,

Alleluia.

The Holy LORD, He is Love,

Alleluia.

What a perfectly sweet way to end this Easter.

A Blink

My mom died one month ago today. It seems like a lot longer to me. I wonder if it feels like just a blink to her.