Monday, February 11, 2019

Metaphorically Speaking

Xander (7): Mom, am I Roebuck or Dees or both? 
You are both. 
X. Are you both?
Well, not genetically, but. I am both.... um, spiritually. 

X. Do you mean metaphorically?

The Bridge

Xander (7): You know, chemistry is the bridge between every different type of science. It’s like chemistry is the roots and trunk, and anatomy, astronomy and biology are the branches, and philosophy is a falling leaf.

Me: Which branch is philosophy falling from?

Xander: I’m not sure. I don’t really know all the factions of science yet. I only know a few so far. 

Saturday, December 01, 2018

The 1,000,000 dollar question

Xander (7): Is Santa real?
Millie (5): OF COURSE he is! If he wasn’t real, who leaves the presents on Christmas Eve?!
Xander: Well, what if when it’s really late, the parents put out the gifts from Santa and write “from Santa” on those gifts. Is that one theory?

Saturday, November 17, 2018


I was downstairs working when I heard Xander (7) suddenly screaming from his bedroom. I went running to him. 

Me: Xander, what’s wrong? Are you ok?
Xander: (panicked voice) I don’t know! I don’t if this is an emergency!
Me: What happened?
Xander: I put my toenail in my NOSE!
Me: (Laughing)
Xander: What? Is it bad?? Oh, no! Is it BAD?
Me: It’s not an emergency. Just don’t do it again. 

Friday, November 02, 2018


Xander (7), coming out of a public women’s restroom with me:

Mom, this bathroom has free napkins and a machine for napkins that cost 25 cents. Huh. 

Tuesday, October 30, 2018

Live TV

Overheard at the Roebuck house this week:

Millie (5) looking at the PBS Kids App: Xander, what does this say?
Xander (7): That says “Live TV.”
Millie: What does it mean?
Xander: It means that this show is playing right now somewhere in a hotel. 

We primarily use streaming and DVDs for the media our kids watch. The only time they see broadcast television is when we stay at hotels. Apparently Xander thinks that’s the only place you can watch live television. Funny!

Monday, October 29, 2018

Poetry with Xander

Xander (7) had a school assignment to pick out any poem and read it. The lesson plan suggested nursery rhymes, but Xander insisted on reading Shakespeare because he heard his poems were really good. So we looked up Shakespeare’s sonnet 106 and read it together. 

When we finished, Xander sat there silent for a minute and then took a deep breath. 

“Well, that wasn’t too catchy.”

Thursday, October 25, 2018

Show Me The Money

October 25, 2016

Maggie (9): Mom, are you proud of me? Are you proud of my hard work?

Me: Maggie, I am SO proud of you. You worked so hard, and you did a great job.

Maggie (with an enormous, charming smile): Well, how 'bout you turn that pride into CASH.